Could Care Less vs. Couldn’t Care Less

I don’t consider myself a particularly irritable person, but I do have a few pet peeves. I can’t stand when the covers on my bed get rumpled and disheveled, rendering me tangled and immobilized. It drives me bonkers when those high-tech toilets with the automatic-flush feature flush at the most inconvenient and inappropriate times (which they always do). And I find it extremely inconsiderate when the driver in front of me slows down and turns without ever having used his blinker. But perhaps one of my greatest pet peeves is the widespread mispronunciation of the phrase “couldn’t care less.”

The phrase is meant to express an utter indifference.

“I hate to disappoint, but I am not going to make it to dinner tonight, my dear,” he said apologetically.

“Quite frankly, Daniel, I couldn’t care less,” she sniffed.

Providing the “she” in this example really does not at all care whether or not she sees Daniel at dinner tonight, this is the proper use of “couldn’t care less.” She cares so incredibly little about his attendance to the meal, that she actually could not care any less.

The common mistake people often make is to proclaim they “could care less,” when really, what they mean to express is that they don’t care at all.

“I hate to disappoint, but I am not going to make it to dinner tonight, my dear,” he said apologetically.

“Quite frankly, Daniel, I could care less,” she sniffed.

She could care less? She could? Quite literally then, she does care–at least a little–because she could care at least a little bit less.

Regarding some of my own pet peeves, then:

The blankets on the bed are in a disarray–twisted and tangled and balled up.

Oh, I could care less. I could care a lot less. In fact, we are going to have to fix that before we can go to sleep.

I walk into the bathroom stall and am greeted by the whooshing and whirring of a flushing toilet. I haven’t even locked the door yet, for crying out loud.

Again, I could care less. A lot less. How many gallons of water did we just waste? And how many more times is that thing going to flush before I’m through?

There are many things, though, that I really couldn’t care less about. What’s for dinner tonight? I couldn’t care less, just so long as I get to eat dinner. Should we make a reservation for 6:15 or 6:30? Couldn’t care less. What’s fifteen minutes? You get the idea.

The next time someone tells you she could care less about something, the proper response might be, “Really? How much less?”

 

 

 

 

 

 

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